What’s your baggage?

As a Forty Plusser I want to ask you this one question: Do you feel that your emotional baggage of your past sometimes kind of “creeps up” on you?

I must be honest that I occasionally find myself in a situation that I act over dramatically in a certain kind of way. I snap at a person for no apparent reason. Afterwards I wonder: “Jee whiz“woman, why did you handle the situation “that”way? The only explanation I can think of is that my subconscious triggers and influence the way I negatively think and respond because of some past emotional baggage that I maybe haven’t dealt with?

Related image

You have to get over it, but how? How can you unload your emotional baggage? I don’t have the answer. Your thoughts can become your master. Emotional baggage plays a big role on how we think and the actions we take now. These underlying feelings can own us if we only concentrate on the negative sides of our lives. Emotional baggage can clog your mind with negativity. Here’s the thing. If you don’t get over your past you will not be able to appreciate the beautiful things in life. Letting go of your emotional baggage is always worth it!

I am in my forties. I am more mature. I have dealt with most of my past. But there are also days that my I wonder “how did I end up like this?”. Every single person on earth has pain. Emotional pain is part of what makes us who we are. There is an issue regarding a person’s past – Your past can affect how you act on a daily basis.

Do you know why everybody around you tells you to forgive and forget? It is simple: If you can’t let go of your past experiences you will be unable to move on in life.

Here’s my list of emotional baggage that I had/have to unpack!

  • Guilt – Why do we hang onto guilt? It is a form of self punishment. I needed to forgive myself and seek forgiveness from those I have wronged. To overcome guilt I had to think “more of myself”. When you feel guilty you see yourself as a bad person. The truth is that I also did good things in life and I do have personality traits I am proud of.
  • Habits – When habits are rooted in deep hurts and fears, it can really take a long time to change these habits. In order to change my negative habits I really try to practice patience and mindfulness. I am not a perfect person and I am a “constant work in progress”. Emotional baggage needs to be acknowledged and gently released to help you let go of your negative thoughts. My spiritual values also helps me to change my habits.
  • Communicating – Have you ever noticed that you treat a person that talks to you badly, simply because they remind you of a person who had hurt you in the past? Even the words that other people speak can trigger something from your past…
  • Forgiveness – To let go of the resentment, bitterness and pain I felt with having an alcoholic father, I had to forgive him. Yes, I had forgive him, because these past painful experiences just formed unhealthy patterns that keeps repeating itself all over and over again. I had to accept that not every person that drinks is bad or would turn out to become an alcoholic. I also needed to let go of this emotional baggage because I started to destroy myself and people around me.
  • Self-love – There are days that I really struggle to love myself! Is this maybe a sign that I had not let go of all my emotional baggage? I know that I need to clear my heart, mind and soul of all hatred to be set free to love myself again. I tend to judge myself quite harshly. It’s a fact that too much self-criticism leads us to focus on our so-called failures instead of ways that we could improve.
  • Anger – The only person affected by your anger is you! If the person that wronged you won’t ask for forgiveness it is their problem and not yours. Don’t hang onto anger. If a person asks for forgiveness, just give it!

Please tell me:

What practices would you suggest to let go of your past hurts and emotions?

Wisdom: “Each of us carries baggage around with us. Every now and then we drop of a piece and move on. At other times we just pick up more baggage, but don’t move on.
Anyway we look at it, we are all porters in life’s hotel.”
Anthony T.Hincks

40 thoughts on “What’s your baggage?

  1. In depth analysis.Well articulated.I feel just shed the baggage,whatever type it is….just forgive and forget simply move on and be a better person based on your experience.Thank you Fortysomething.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Yes, and to me that is normal, but it is how we deal with it that matters. The past is the past and the only way to move is forward…

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I try not to think of past hurts from people. Where possible I avoid them. Think of the good things in my life, and count my blessings every day.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I have to understand what happened in order to let go. Also, if the answer to my questions are not anywhere in sight, I force myself to think of something else.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I can tell what baggage needs to be unpacked and put away by how often I think about it. When something becomes repetitive I give it more attention so as to dismantle it which then results in peace. Sometimes it’s just acknowledgment, sometimes it’s forgivesness, sometimes it’s tears.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Don’t allow someone else’s bad actions change the good person you are. 🌟✨💫

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Well written

    Liked by 1 person

      1. My pleasure

        Liked by 1 person

  8. A very deep thought and question needs to be asked from self

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Beautiful article, explained very well 💯

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I had an alcoholic father as well. It took some time to forgive, but thankfully I did. So many of our current issues stem from issues from our past. I read a book called, “adult children of alcoholics.” It’s a good read. Check it out.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi, I will definetly check it out. Thanks for stopping by.


  11. I don’t think we can completely unpack it; even when it appears empty, the essence of it seems to seep into the bag lining itself, and we cannot simply toss the bag, for we are only allotted the one and must always carry it. The best way I’ve found so far is to choose wisely who we surround ourselves with, for when we are flooded with love and laughter and light from new sources, it is like fresh sunshine in that bag lining and over time, it becomes odorless.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Totally agree… “choose wisely who we surround ourselves with”. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Loved this post! For me I used to have a lot of emotional baggage and would have trouble letting go of them. But as I got other, I learned that life really was too short and would simply let it go and not care about them. I just learned to be straight forward when dealing with others, or just express my feelings right then and there so that I have no regrets and move on.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi, I really like the “I learned that life really was too short…” thanks for stopping by!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. cool

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Stay away from those that constantly trigger it!! They will take every opportunity to help you fail. Even though you’ve done all you can to overcome. That’s my solution

    Liked by 1 person

  15. They do eventually pass with time and faith. Intellectuality cannot take the place of spirituality.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are absolutely right Mystic Dee 🌻


  16. dessertflower5 Jul 7, 2020 — 9:47 am

    A worth while read. Loved it. Conects with me so much

    Liked by 1 person

      1. dessertflower5 Sep 24, 2020 — 7:59 am

        The pleasure is all mine

        Liked by 1 person

  17. Very well written

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Well I am past the age of forty something and I grew up with two alcoholic parents. It is easy to say move on forget the past but if you were neglected or abused it is not that easy. I agree with Benjamin. First if you haven’t read any Adult Children of Alcoholic ACOA books, that is a great place to start. There is a library of great reads that will help you to say, “wow I never knew other people just like me existed.” I did this in my twenties and then saw a therapist three days a week for four years. It is hard to let go of feelings you can’t even identify. It took me to my fifties to truly forgive both of my parents. I had said the words many times but I had not really forgiven them. I have a wonderful life today and give all the blessings to God for my mere survival. I applaud you for asking all the right questions. Perhaps attend a support group. You will find people you can relate too and perhaps make life long friends.
    Good luck my friend, I will say a prayer for you. I loved your post and all the sweet pictures. Love ❤️ Joni

    I am a warrior, a survivor and a very empathetic and intuitive person because of the way I grew up.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you very much. You are an inspiration!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you my friend and you are an inspiration, a survivor and a wonderful warrior woman. Love to you and all those you love. ❤️💕🤗

        Liked by 1 person

  19. I think half of your life is learning who you want to be like, and half is learning who you *don’t* want to be like.

    When something unpleasant from my past bubbles up, I try to say to myself, “But it ends here. I’m not passing this on.”

    Liked by 1 person

  20. When I was in my early40s i thought i might have to be a single parent. I knew i had to get rid of my old baggage or my kids would bear the brunt of it. I wet for therapy, took out old photo albums and said :”Goodbye” to all that old stuff. It seemed that with acknowledging the baggage it gave it permission to leave me. I am in my 70s now and I am glad I did that.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


Random things are random

Marcy Goes Wild

Unofficial World Record Holder interviewing DJ's about their first gig


Photography and Travel


Best PPE products

RaduH's Blog

Life with kids and tech. Everybody likes a good story.

Photos by Jez

Taking the camera for a walk!!!

%d bloggers like this:
search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close