Really! Do you still cope?

As a Forty Plusser I really don’t know how to feel today.  I have bipolar and I am usually triggered by any negative situation.  But not today.  I feel sort of “blunt”.  I don’t feel depressed, down in the dumps, anxious or anything.  Not even happy.

Two weeks ago I almost thought it was the end the world with this Covid 19 virus.  I went from totally totally depressed to total anger… then I began to feel sorry for all the people in the world… then I cried for hours at a time…  then suddenly I had all this “survival plans”… then NOTHING.  I don’t feel a thing.

This past weekend was Easter-weekend. (Good Friday 10 April 2020).  Never before had we spent an Easter like this.  Lockdowned in our house.  But I am slowly getting used to this “Lockdown way of life”. I think that part of a human’s survival instinct is to adapt in life.  To accept certain things and just move on with life not matter what?

neon signage
Photo by Ivan Bertolazzi on

There are days that I really hope that it is only me that is experiencing or imagining about this virus.  Maybe I am hopefully delusional!!!!!!!   Really!!!   I pinch myself regularly throughout the day hoping that I will wake up and that none of this is the truth. 

My psychiatrist called me yesterday to hear if I am coping during the lockdown. My psychiatrist, on the contrary, called each of her patients to find out if they were still okay. I personally think it was very thoughtful of her. It is believed that more people will commit suicide because they cannot deal with this uncertainty and negative circumstances.

So how is life in our household?

  • My kids need to temporarily study online . This is not ideal, but all universities in South Africa are prohibited from offering classes in lecture rooms. This is to help avoid physical contact with other persons.
  • My children (18 and 19 years old). My children are not allowed to visit their girlfriend and boyfriend. It is currently against the  law in South Africa. How bad? They miss each other and it is heartbreaking as a parent to watch it. They miss each other sooooo much! Young love…
  • We all kind of miss our “normal life”.  We miss routine. We miss people!!
I recently shared this post from somebody’s timeline on facebook. Just so I never forget….. April 3, 2020 South Africa
– Petrol prices are R13.76
– School cancelled – yes, cancelled
– Tape on the floors at grocery stores and others to help distance shoppers (1m) from each other.
– Limited number of people inside stores, therefore, lineups outside the store doors.
– Non-essential stores and businesses mandated closed.
– Parks, trails, entire cities locked up.
– Entire sports seasons cancelled.
– Concerts, tours, festivals, entertainment events – cancelled.
– Weddings, family celebrations, holiday gatherings cancelled.
– No funerals
– No masses, churches are closed.
– No gatherings of 50 or more
– Don’t socialize with anyone outside of your home.
– Shortage of masks, gowns, gloves for our front-line workers.
– Shortage of ventilators for the critically ill.
– Panic buying sets in and we have no toilet paper, no disinfecting supplies, no paper towel no laundry soap, no hand sanitizer.
– Shelves are bare.
– Manufacturers, distilleries and other businesses switch their lines to help make visors, masks, hand sanitizer and PPE.
– Government closes the border to all non-essential travel.
– Fines are established for breaking the rules.
– Stadiums and recreation facilities open up for the overflow of Covid-19 patients.
– Press conferences daily from the Presidential section lead by various ministers. Daily updates on new cases, recoveries, and deaths..
– Barely anyone on the roads.
– People wearing masks and gloves outside.
– Essential service workers are terrified to go to work.
– Medical field workers are afraid to go home to their families.
This is the Novel Coronavirus (Covid-19) Pandemic, declared March 11th, 2020.
One day it will show up in my memory feed, and it will be a yearly reminder that life is precious and not to take the things we dearly love for granted.
How are you all coping?

I read the news…  it doesn’t sounds to promising.  But things can always change…  hopefully for the better?? But nobody will know.

Covid-19 in SA: Life is not going to be what it once was, says Prof Karim

2020-04-15 17:05

Professor Salim Abdool Karim.

Professor Salim Abdool Karim. (Rajesh Jantilal, AFP)

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The day South Africa recorded its first positive Covid-19 case on 5 March was a day that altered our way of life drastically, and South Africans will not be able to return to their normal way of doing things, says the chief epidemiologist at the centre of the country’s Covid-19 fight.Professor Salim Abdool Karim, an epidemiologist and infectious disease specialist working with the government in the fight against the coronavirus, has some sobering news: There will be no return to normal.Covid-19 has drastically altered the way we live now, and it will continue to do so in the future as people become more aware of the everyday preventative measures they need to take. 

Financially it is a distaster… to say the least…

person holding pink suede long waller
Photo by Robert Bogdan on



2 thoughts on “Really! Do you still cope?

  1. Hoping you and your family stay safe and well in these strange times.

    Liked by 1 person

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