As a Forty Plusser I must say that I have met some very draining persons in my lifetime. O my word!

BUT Here’s the thing Sometimes I am THAT VDP!! (Please then tell me to shut up!!! ). And I want to say I am really sorry for being an “Class A prick”!!

Let’s be honest – Nobody’s perfect! Every person on this earth has a bit of  “Emotional draining kind of vampire” in them.     

You can easily become the victim of a VDP!

What is an emotional vampire?

“Emotional vampires are called emotional vampires because they have a tendency to drain the emotional energy out of everyone they come in contact with”.


You all know these emotional vampires. (People that literally suck all emotional happiness out of you). You absolutely cannot stand to be in their presence anymore!  You want to say “B*tch, please leave me alone, I don’t want to hear one word you are saying anymore….”. Point is: People don’t like “soul-draining”people. VDP’s exhaust your emotional strength.

“Psychological research demonstrates that insults and criticism can be five times more powerful than positive communication such as compliments. If you want to keep your relationships flourishing, you need a lot of positive interaction”.

Nobody likes to be in the company of a VDP. If you want to be happy you must have minimal contact with negative people. For this reason you must try to avoid toxic people. You will stress and become emotionally drained – so do yourself a big favor and cut them out of your life!

One of the trademarks of a VDP is to always criticize you. Okay, we all have our flaws, but don’t need to be reminded of it all the time! Maybe one of your best friends frequently criticize your looks or behaviour. Very draining persons like to emphasize your flaws!

Some trademarks:

Self obsessed, always controlling, gossiping big time or bad-mouthing people, drama queen/king. Very draining persons are totally self-absorbed.

Only a VDP has problems: Everytime you want to tell a VDP of your problems the conversation turns to THEIR problems of the past/current. They are not interested in your issues.

A very draining person(VDP) likes to manipulate: If your gut instinct tells you that you are a victim of manipulation, you probably are. They will always want to make you feel guilty. They like to control situations.

A very draining person(VDP) is always surrounded by drama: Drama is not good for your emotional health. Family and friends who are always in the midst of drama will suck your energy.

A very draining person(VDP) is always right: You cannot convince a VDP that he/she is wrong. A VDP will try everything to win a disagreement. They are ALWAYS correct.

A very draining person(VDP) can be evil: Sometimes a VDP can become emotionally abusive and may seek revenge.

A very draining person(VDP) sees everything negative: They can never see a positive side in anyone or anything.  (Complain…complain…complain…Blah blah blah).

A very draining person(VDP) may scare you: Maybe you feel like you are always walking on eggshells around a VDP?

A very draining person(VDP) is needy: Emotional vampires are usually abusive and needy.

A very draining person(VDP) is always “me first”: A VDP has a grandiose sense of self-importance.

So how can you protect yourself from a VDP?: Don’t let their venomous opinions and behaviour poison your relationships. Sometimes it is necessary to set clear boundaries, like to tell a VDP at the workplace that conversations may only be work related. Keep all conversations sweet and short. You cannot reason with an emotional vampire so try to avoid them.

Wisdom: “people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Wisdom: “Life offers a cruel choice: you can be right or happy. Not both. This is true regardless of whom you may be involved with, but it is especially true if there is an emotional vampire in your life.”
Albert J. Bernstein, Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry

Categories Life lesson, Mental Health

2 thoughts on “VDP = VERY DRAINING PERSON!!!

  1. This is spot on. I am so much better off without VDP’s in my life now!!! I also worry about being one myself at times. Sigh. Yet, it is hard to actually separate, in part, because VDP’s drain you so much you don’t have the strength or courage left to cut ties.

    Liked by 1 person

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